Is

The one big maybe, is.

And it's wonderful.

Oh sure, there are many mornings when I just want to lay there, curled up in the warm bed, but there's breakfast to be made (what will he refuse today?), there's a diaper to change (please, diaper, I hope you held up during the night, do I have to get a bigger size already?), there's a trip to the park to make (don't forget the sunscreen, hat, snacks, water, extra clothes, diaper bag, I hope he doesn't eat the wood chips at the playground), there's lunch to prepare (what will he refuse today?), there's a nap to take (will he fall asleep without crying because he would rather play play play? how long will he sleep please make it two hours so he's well rested and maybe mama can take a nap nap too), there's a snack or two (how many cheerios can one child eat? his hand is permanently inserted in the snack trap, wonderful invention), there's play (in other words, scatter the blocks, throw the legos, chase the dog, dog licks him resulting in a temporary rash, maybe play with the bubble machine, a little bit of baby einstein), there's dinner (what will he refuse today? will he just eat rice by the handfuls?), bathtime (in the kitchen sink, because we are too old to bend over in a tub, unless it's a Saturday then we all get in the tub), there's getting ready for bed (to nurse or not to nurse? he'd rather nurse, I've stopped pumping since the end of February and oh my gosh, I thought he'd be weaned by now? Oh well, when you want boobie you want boobie but I've been reducing it by one night a week, in other words, 6 on, 1 off, next week will be 2 on, 5 off, and so on until *cross your fingers* the boobie will be near and dear to his distant memory), including storytime, brushing teeth, lots of kisses, a cry in protest, then off to sleep land.

But wait, that's just the weekend!

I wish I had the luxury of staying home with him. During the week I just have 3.5 hours to spend with him after work, since I stopped the morning feedings a few months ago. Now that it's warmer we try to squeeze in a walk after dinner (well, he goes for a ride in the hiking backpack, loves it!). We make the most of our time together, which of course includes lots of hugs and kisses.

Anyway, I will migrate my thoughts to another blog, which is in its infant stages at the moment, and so far the tone of the blog is balancing motherhood and working (for insane people) and carrying around deadbabymama baggage. Yes, of course it pops up here and there.

Message me if you want to know where I'll be (and if you're the type of person who will leave a comment that links to a stupid website thinking it's going to get you more customers, and you don't realize that only three people read this blog a year, do not bother! I'd really like to throw wadded up poopy diapers at you. Big poopies.)